Today, May 17, 2010, was my first day alone in my new job. What a ride this last month has been! I lost my job, of course, and thought I was going to be one of the unemployed millions for a while. I was almost looking forward to it, when fate...ah fate!...stepped in.
There was a lady at my office who had worked closely with me on some situations, so I was somewhat familiar with her job. It just so happened that I saw the job posting after she announced her imminent retirement, and applied for the job. I went to the interview and was pretty sure that I had the job. I was right. They offered it to me, and I accepted. Meanwhile, I was offered an interview at another location. I started my new job on Monday, and interviewed for the other job on Tuesday. I just KNEW I had that job! Turns out, though, I'm not "fast-paced" enough for them, so they turned me down. Just as well, I think. Later on, they might decide I'm too something else for the job, or not enough of another thing for the job. So, I threw myself into learning the new one that I already had. After all, a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush, isn't that what they say? Let me tell you...it's true! Two jobs hanging out there was not good for anyone involved, and I was glad when it was all over.
So, I learned what I could, got lots of phone numbers to call in case I run into anything crazy, and started my new position this morning. I spent most of the day arranging things in the office. My friend pranked me this morning by calling and pretending to be a client who was very upset with me. I hung up on her. It was hilarious when I found out it was her. Good to have friends. She WILL be watching her back from now own. =)
Thing is, I now have a nice big office, with a big window through which I watched the rain pour down all day. I didn't have to leave my friends. I know the job, and I know I can do it.
The whole day, I kept looking around almost in disbelief. Over and over in my head, the theme song to "Working Girl" kept playing. The movie that, many years ago, made me want to get back out into the working world. The movie where when you have the guts to keep trying for something, and fail, and try again, finally it all comes out good in the end. I am a working girl, and I finally made it to that office!
"Let the river run, let all the dreamers wake the nation, Come, the New Jerusalem" -Carly Simon
Monday, May 17, 2010
Saturday, May 1, 2010
Wake Up!
I do not like to go to bed
Because I know it means
A struggle for this sleepyhead
To awaken from my dreams.
So now I've made a system
For waking up. You see,
Each night before I go to bed
I set my clock for three.
At three o'clock the buzzer sounds
I stumble 'cross the floor.
Yawning, cussing, with a frown
I set the clock for four.
Four o'clock comes all too soon.
I barely am alive.
I look outside and see the moon!
And set the clock for five.
At five o'clock I realize
That I'm in quite a fix.
I lie in bed and dream sweet dreams.
I've set the clock for six.
At six o'clock another system
Starts to come to light.
A snooze bar placed atop my clock
Helps extend my night.
So every ten minutes for an hour or so
I slap my clock around.
I'm sure the neighbors are awake
From all that buzzing sound!
I finally wake at seven fifteen
Not ready to face the day
But I am up and out the door.
I'm actually on my way!
So, if you hate mornings, like I do,
You might give this a try.
What works for me might work for you.
But wait -- I cannot lie!
I must admit, reluctantly,
A secret I have kept.
Every day I'm late for work
Because I overslept.
kbozell 5/19/04
Thursday, April 22, 2010
Two Months and Nine Days
I lost my job yesterday. I had it in the morning, but by the afternoon it was lost. I poured three years into that job. I learned everything I could about it. Did things with it that nobody else had ever done! I cleaned up its messes. I even got up earlier than I ever thought I could just to be able to spend time with it. And still, it is lost. Never to be found again. It should be a simple thing to take care of, clean out the desk, take the pictures off the wall, make sure I take my multicolored staples home.
But, there is a problem. Every day for the next two months and nine (well, eight now) days I have to go and sit where my job was. I have to still provide for it, do things for it, even though it is gone. How will I do that? It’s like sitting beside a coffin at a funeral home, desperately wishing the person wasn't dead. It wasn’t true. The person in there will surely start moving again any minute and it will be a big joke. Right? Wrong! My job is as dead and gone as that corpse in the coffin. Yet, here I am, and here I shall be every day, working half-heartedly at a job that no longer exists. Half-heartedly because I know that it is useless now. All my hard work has been deemed dispensable. Its impact has been negated. The job doesn’t care. This is the second day and, already, I can tell it is going to be a miserable 69 more. But I must prevail if I am to reap any of the benefits I have worked so hard to earn. Because you see, my job didn’t run away, it was stolen from me by greedy people who don’t care about anything but the bottom line.
So yes, I had a job. Not good, not bad, just a job. Necessary things, jobs. And even though people around me were falling by the wayside every day, I somehow didn’t think I would join their ranks. So my time with my precious job seemed to stretch out in front of me to the horizon with no end in sight. I began to see myself in 11 years or so, sitting on the front porch while my job just kept going. Suddenly, I was told I had 70 days and my job would be no more. For the first time in 3 years, the clock started to tick.
Funny thing, time. (Please forgive me if I’ve written these same things before..) 70 days of sitting at this desk, actually 50, if you don’t count weekends and holidays, seems like an eternity. How can I even pretend to care what happens to it, now that it has left me? To get a paycheck? Sure, but even then..it’s like being stuck on a merry go round. You are getting sick of going nowhere, but it won’t stop. Do they expect me to jump off, maybe? Make it easier for them to say, see? I knew she wasn’t worth the money. See how easily she gave up working on that dead job? NO! I will not do that. They do not deserve that satisfaction! They deserve to have to continue paying me for the job I am no longer doing! Two months and 9 days is such a long time, but I will prevail!
You know, if I was told I only had 70 days to live…those days would seem like just a mere moment. I would scramble to live every day to the fullest. 70 days to be in a locked cell, only allowed bread and water…an eternity. See what I mean? The TRULY precious things are the ones that you want to hold on to. To make last. Not this dead job. These 70 days cannot pass fast enough, because when they are done, I will begin a new life. New possibilities. New job (I hope). I will be able to look toward the horizon with new eyes and, hopefully, will see a future where my job cares for me as much as I care for my job.
70 days, 69, 68, 67…..and counting….
But, there is a problem. Every day for the next two months and nine (well, eight now) days I have to go and sit where my job was. I have to still provide for it, do things for it, even though it is gone. How will I do that? It’s like sitting beside a coffin at a funeral home, desperately wishing the person wasn't dead. It wasn’t true. The person in there will surely start moving again any minute and it will be a big joke. Right? Wrong! My job is as dead and gone as that corpse in the coffin. Yet, here I am, and here I shall be every day, working half-heartedly at a job that no longer exists. Half-heartedly because I know that it is useless now. All my hard work has been deemed dispensable. Its impact has been negated. The job doesn’t care. This is the second day and, already, I can tell it is going to be a miserable 69 more. But I must prevail if I am to reap any of the benefits I have worked so hard to earn. Because you see, my job didn’t run away, it was stolen from me by greedy people who don’t care about anything but the bottom line.
So yes, I had a job. Not good, not bad, just a job. Necessary things, jobs. And even though people around me were falling by the wayside every day, I somehow didn’t think I would join their ranks. So my time with my precious job seemed to stretch out in front of me to the horizon with no end in sight. I began to see myself in 11 years or so, sitting on the front porch while my job just kept going. Suddenly, I was told I had 70 days and my job would be no more. For the first time in 3 years, the clock started to tick.
Funny thing, time. (Please forgive me if I’ve written these same things before..) 70 days of sitting at this desk, actually 50, if you don’t count weekends and holidays, seems like an eternity. How can I even pretend to care what happens to it, now that it has left me? To get a paycheck? Sure, but even then..it’s like being stuck on a merry go round. You are getting sick of going nowhere, but it won’t stop. Do they expect me to jump off, maybe? Make it easier for them to say, see? I knew she wasn’t worth the money. See how easily she gave up working on that dead job? NO! I will not do that. They do not deserve that satisfaction! They deserve to have to continue paying me for the job I am no longer doing! Two months and 9 days is such a long time, but I will prevail!
You know, if I was told I only had 70 days to live…those days would seem like just a mere moment. I would scramble to live every day to the fullest. 70 days to be in a locked cell, only allowed bread and water…an eternity. See what I mean? The TRULY precious things are the ones that you want to hold on to. To make last. Not this dead job. These 70 days cannot pass fast enough, because when they are done, I will begin a new life. New possibilities. New job (I hope). I will be able to look toward the horizon with new eyes and, hopefully, will see a future where my job cares for me as much as I care for my job.
70 days, 69, 68, 67…..and counting….
Sunday, April 4, 2010
Spring has Sprung!
Beautiful day here in Indiana! 70 degrees or so, 60% chance of thunderstorms overnight...great springtime weather. No heat, no AC, door open, windows open ahhhhh...spring. I didn't even mind the itchy eyes so much. My wind chimes have been ringing all day. I have a chime set that is tuned, and sometimes it sounds like it's playing "Renegade" by Styx. Interesting.
I planted some seeds in little peat pots today. I'm really excited to see how they do. I have claimed this house as my own and now am trying to make it so. I always have so many plans and then end up not getting them done, but now that I have planted the little buggers, I guess I'll have to figure out somewhere to give them a home. We'll see. I'll just have to get UN-lazy and start working on it.
Spring always brings nostalgia for some reason. Fall is worse for me in that respect, but spring definitely has its weird feelings. Probably is related to the change in barometric pressure or the earth being off its axis a little bit, something like that. But I always feel like I've forgotten something...like I forgot to go on a diet, usually... But there is a certain longing for something that is indefinable, but is so real I can almost reach out and touch it. I don't know if it's wanderlust, or just a desire to be a kid again and go out and play in the yard. Back in the days when dandelions were beautiful flowers and not just a pesky little weed that makes the yard look tacky.
I'm not sure what it is. I guess it's what they call "Spring Fever". Well, if that's what it's called, then I have a huge case of it this year! I'm ready to get outside and kill the poison ivy! rake the gravel! Plant morning glories beside anything that will allow them to climb up! Feed every bird in the neighborhood! Note that there's not much spring cleaning going on. I'm pretty sure THAT'S not what I've been longing for!
So happy spring to everyone! Do something that makes you happy this spring. Don't miss it! Boinnnnnng! Spring has sprung!
I planted some seeds in little peat pots today. I'm really excited to see how they do. I have claimed this house as my own and now am trying to make it so. I always have so many plans and then end up not getting them done, but now that I have planted the little buggers, I guess I'll have to figure out somewhere to give them a home. We'll see. I'll just have to get UN-lazy and start working on it.
Spring always brings nostalgia for some reason. Fall is worse for me in that respect, but spring definitely has its weird feelings. Probably is related to the change in barometric pressure or the earth being off its axis a little bit, something like that. But I always feel like I've forgotten something...like I forgot to go on a diet, usually... But there is a certain longing for something that is indefinable, but is so real I can almost reach out and touch it. I don't know if it's wanderlust, or just a desire to be a kid again and go out and play in the yard. Back in the days when dandelions were beautiful flowers and not just a pesky little weed that makes the yard look tacky.
I'm not sure what it is. I guess it's what they call "Spring Fever". Well, if that's what it's called, then I have a huge case of it this year! I'm ready to get outside and kill the poison ivy! rake the gravel! Plant morning glories beside anything that will allow them to climb up! Feed every bird in the neighborhood! Note that there's not much spring cleaning going on. I'm pretty sure THAT'S not what I've been longing for!
So happy spring to everyone! Do something that makes you happy this spring. Don't miss it! Boinnnnnng! Spring has sprung!
Thursday, March 18, 2010
I'd rather have a root canal
Steve Martin in Little Shop of HorrorsWhen I was young and just a bad little kid,
My momma noticed funny things I did.
Like shootin' puppies with a BB-Gun.
I'd poison guppies, and when I was done,
I'd find a pussy-cat and bash in it's head.
That's when my momma said...
(What did she say?)
She said my boy I think someday
You'll find a way
To make your natural tendencies pay...
You'll be a dentist.
You have a talent for causing things pain!
Son, be a dentist.
People will pay you to be inhumane!
You're temperament's wrong for the priesthood,
And teaching would suit you still less.
Son, be a dentist.
You'll be a success!
So...this is the way I have thought about dentists ever since a certain unnamed asshole gave me 13 shots and even when I didn't get numb, drilled away! Before that, I was never scared of the dentist. Dr Robertson was sooo handsome, and he always said..Oh! There's that mean old Karen again! It wasn't an ordeal. Just something that had to be done. And afterwards, we got suckers!!! Keep 'em comin back!
However, Dr Jones, we shall call him, wasn't handsome, nor did he particularly care that I wasn't numb. He just kept shooting and drilling. Kinda like boot camp? Anyway, after that day I have been terrified of dentists. This is quite obvious if you look at my molars. I only have 4 left. The rest have had to be pulled because they got so bad they couldn't be fixed. I had neither the desire nor the money to do that, so I had them yanked. Each time I would go in a white-knuckled wreck and come out thinking...wow..that wasn't so bad. I might even make an appointment to go back. But I wouldn't.
This time, though, I had a choice. Dr B said I needed a root canal pretty soon. I put it off for as long as I could, but it started hurting sometimes, so I set an appointment. The closer it got, the more nervous I got. I found out how much it was going to cost. I decided to just get it pulled. My sister, bless her, said I should probably try to save the tooth and offered to help pay for the crown to keep it in my head. So I decided to go ahead with it. (As it turned out, she didn't have to help, so that was cool)
Today was the day.
I think it helps to tell the receptionist that you are scared. When the dentist, who is quite handsome, by the way, came in, he said he had heard I was "a little nervous" and promptly shot me up with a double dose of anesthetic. I won't feel the left side of my face til tomorrow! Even my NOSE is numb! I told him I couldn't believe how scared I was. After all, just a year ago I had a doctor cut both of my leg bones off and stick metal stuff in their place. I don't think I was this scared then.
I think it's because I didn't see it, you know? After all, when a dentist is in your mouth, well, he's right in your face! He had said I wouldn't have to do anything..maybe hold a tooth or something. I think he was kidding, but still... When I had my knee surgery, I didn't have to hold my freakin kneecap so the doc could pound the metal into my leg, ya know??? Plus I was totally asleep and dreaming of a happy place. Whatever happened to gassing patients??
Anyway, today I was numb, for sure, and he put this rubber dam thingy in my mouth and laid the chair back, pulled down those weird little magnifying glasses and started drilling. He had two hands in my mouth...the dental assistant had two hands in my mouth, and I felt like I had been abducted by aliens!
If they could ever make a drill that didn't make noise or vibrate your head or smell like something burning, people wouldn't mind going to the dentist so much. Someone should work on that! In fact, if it hadn't been for all the noise and stuff, I probably would've fallen asleep, because I almost did as it was! I just kept closing my eyes and waiting for something to hurt.
All in all, it wasn't a terrible experience. My hands were as numb as my face because I was clenching them so tightly. But it didn't hurt, and I'm very thankful for that. He wouldn't give me drugs, though.oh well...
My brother said once that teeth were not one of God's better creations. I tend to agree. They are necessary, though, and with a dentist like mine, I plan on taking better care of the ones that remain.
But I can tell you this...next time someone wants me to do something I really really really don't want to do, I can honestly say, "I'd rather have a root canal".
Monday, March 8, 2010
Falling Out of Bed 101 – Learn how in 40 steps!
1. Buy a wonderful new bed!
2. Get a great night’s sleep.
3. Reach over to the nightstand to answer the call from your sister.
4. Roll over and fall 3 ½ feet to the floor and land on your $100,000 knees.
5. Cuss
6. Try to get foot untangled from sheet. Rip a hole in your brand-new sheet.
7. Cuss
8. Try to stand up and talk on the phone at the same time.
9. Cuss
10. Tell sister you will call her back. Hang up.
11. Cuss
12. Take a deep breath and get under control.
13. Lay down on your belly and begin scooting backwards to the end of the bed.
14. Get elbow untangled from the extension cord on the floor.
15. Cuss
16. Ignore the fact that your nightgown is now up around your armpits.
17. Scoot, Cuss, Scoot
18. Realize you really have to pee.
19. Cuss
20. Get to the end of the bed. Try to get up on your knees.
21. Scream because they hurt…you just FELL on them, idiot!
22. Ignore the fact that the cats are all staring at you.
23. Cuss at the damn cats.
24. Try to remember how you got up when you fell down on the back porch last year.
25. Put right foot back, slip on carpet.
26. Cuss
27. Put right foot back again, then put left foot back.
28. Dig painful ingrown toenails into carpet.
29. Cuss
30. Raise up on elbows, then to palms.Walk legs up toward hands.
31. Stand up, run to bathroom before you wet your pants.
32. Cuss
33. Call frantic sister back. Assure her that you are ok. Hang up.
34. Cuss
35. Cry
36. Cuss
37. Make sure everything is still moving correctly.
38. Laugh
39. Cuss
40. Do not repeat!
2. Get a great night’s sleep.
3. Reach over to the nightstand to answer the call from your sister.
4. Roll over and fall 3 ½ feet to the floor and land on your $100,000 knees.
5. Cuss
6. Try to get foot untangled from sheet. Rip a hole in your brand-new sheet.
7. Cuss
8. Try to stand up and talk on the phone at the same time.
9. Cuss
10. Tell sister you will call her back. Hang up.
11. Cuss
12. Take a deep breath and get under control.
13. Lay down on your belly and begin scooting backwards to the end of the bed.
14. Get elbow untangled from the extension cord on the floor.
15. Cuss
16. Ignore the fact that your nightgown is now up around your armpits.
17. Scoot, Cuss, Scoot
18. Realize you really have to pee.
19. Cuss
20. Get to the end of the bed. Try to get up on your knees.
21. Scream because they hurt…you just FELL on them, idiot!
22. Ignore the fact that the cats are all staring at you.
23. Cuss at the damn cats.
24. Try to remember how you got up when you fell down on the back porch last year.
25. Put right foot back, slip on carpet.
26. Cuss
27. Put right foot back again, then put left foot back.
28. Dig painful ingrown toenails into carpet.
29. Cuss
30. Raise up on elbows, then to palms.Walk legs up toward hands.
31. Stand up, run to bathroom before you wet your pants.
32. Cuss
33. Call frantic sister back. Assure her that you are ok. Hang up.
34. Cuss
35. Cry
36. Cuss
37. Make sure everything is still moving correctly.
38. Laugh
39. Cuss
40. Do not repeat!
Sunday, March 7, 2010
I'm a chicken
I have a friend who asked me to set up an account on a dating site so she could see who was on there from her town. She's married...was just curious...but she didn't feel it would be right to put herself on there. So I agreed. I thought I would go ahead (since I was setting up the account anyway) and write a nice profile paragraph, and put a nice picture of myself to just see what happened. That was about 2 weeks ago. I have now deleted my account.
I have several reasons for deleting the account. Mainly it is because I received about 5 emails from "interested" men. Every single one of them said hi. do you have any more pictures? ARRRRRGH!!!!! Hell no, I don't have any more pictures! If I'd had more pictures I would've posted them you friggin idiot!!! Read my damn profile!
I understand that men and women are wired differently. That's cool. I can deal with that. But before the internet had pictures, people actually had to IM each other for a while before finding out what the other looked like. I'll have to admit there were some surprises with some of the ones that I met..ohhhh yeah...lol. I imagine some of them were surprised too. But at least we knew a little bit about each other.
I did get in touch with one fellow that seemed to be really nice. Very articulate. He can actually spell! I talked to him online for a couple of hours today. He said he has problems with women because he has "old fashioned ideas about dating". After our extended conversation, I have come to realize that he is controlling and wants a submissive woman. NOOO WAY! Not for me. I am too set in my ways to put up with that kind of crap. Now I will admit that I might be wrong. But I believe my impression is correct. After all, I'm obviously not the only one who has had that impression.
So I decided rather than put my effort into trying to find someone else to talk to, I'll just continue to do what I'm doing. Maybe one of these days I'll run into someone at the gas station and he'll be the right one. Maybe he'll offer to buy me coffee or a pair of gloves...
I don't know..it's really hard to think about being with someone. When I got married I was young and relatively in shape. We kinda grew up together. But what happens when you are with someone new at my age? How do you get past the fact that your boobs point to the floor and there are weird black hairs that show up overnight on your chin? What about those weird hairs that show up on your BOOBS??? How do you know when it's ok to fart in their presence? How am I going to sit and pluck hairs while watching 24 if there is someone sitting there beside me? How long does it take to get that comfortable? What about my toenails? OMG! I'd have to go get my toes removed before I could even take my shoes off in front of him! And then...IF we took time to get to know each other and IF things kinda went in that direction...eventually he would want to *gulp* have s-e-x.. YIKES!! The very idea of getting naked in front of a man makes me break out in a cold sweat and feel like I'm gonna fart! I just can't imagine. It would be so sad to see a grown man run screaming down the street.
No more dating sites for me. I have in my imagination the kind of guy I'm looking for. Maybe someday he'll come along. If not, I'm cool with that. I just can't see making myself miserable just to have a man around when I have worked so hard to make myself UN-miserable without one. Just doesn't make sense to me.
So, my friend may not have been able to see who in her hometown is looking for a woman. If she did, and she knows any of them, maybe she'll introduce us. If not, she'll have to set up her own account. I'm not going through that again. I titled this "I'm a chicken" but I don't think that's true. I think I'm just wiser than I used to be, and I'm cool by myself.
Where the hell are my tweezers????
I have several reasons for deleting the account. Mainly it is because I received about 5 emails from "interested" men. Every single one of them said hi. do you have any more pictures? ARRRRRGH!!!!! Hell no, I don't have any more pictures! If I'd had more pictures I would've posted them you friggin idiot!!! Read my damn profile!
I understand that men and women are wired differently. That's cool. I can deal with that. But before the internet had pictures, people actually had to IM each other for a while before finding out what the other looked like. I'll have to admit there were some surprises with some of the ones that I met..ohhhh yeah...lol. I imagine some of them were surprised too. But at least we knew a little bit about each other.
I did get in touch with one fellow that seemed to be really nice. Very articulate. He can actually spell! I talked to him online for a couple of hours today. He said he has problems with women because he has "old fashioned ideas about dating". After our extended conversation, I have come to realize that he is controlling and wants a submissive woman. NOOO WAY! Not for me. I am too set in my ways to put up with that kind of crap. Now I will admit that I might be wrong. But I believe my impression is correct. After all, I'm obviously not the only one who has had that impression.
So I decided rather than put my effort into trying to find someone else to talk to, I'll just continue to do what I'm doing. Maybe one of these days I'll run into someone at the gas station and he'll be the right one. Maybe he'll offer to buy me coffee or a pair of gloves...
I don't know..it's really hard to think about being with someone. When I got married I was young and relatively in shape. We kinda grew up together. But what happens when you are with someone new at my age? How do you get past the fact that your boobs point to the floor and there are weird black hairs that show up overnight on your chin? What about those weird hairs that show up on your BOOBS??? How do you know when it's ok to fart in their presence? How am I going to sit and pluck hairs while watching 24 if there is someone sitting there beside me? How long does it take to get that comfortable? What about my toenails? OMG! I'd have to go get my toes removed before I could even take my shoes off in front of him! And then...IF we took time to get to know each other and IF things kinda went in that direction...eventually he would want to *gulp* have s-e-x.. YIKES!! The very idea of getting naked in front of a man makes me break out in a cold sweat and feel like I'm gonna fart! I just can't imagine. It would be so sad to see a grown man run screaming down the street.
No more dating sites for me. I have in my imagination the kind of guy I'm looking for. Maybe someday he'll come along. If not, I'm cool with that. I just can't see making myself miserable just to have a man around when I have worked so hard to make myself UN-miserable without one. Just doesn't make sense to me.
So, my friend may not have been able to see who in her hometown is looking for a woman. If she did, and she knows any of them, maybe she'll introduce us. If not, she'll have to set up her own account. I'm not going through that again. I titled this "I'm a chicken" but I don't think that's true. I think I'm just wiser than I used to be, and I'm cool by myself.
Where the hell are my tweezers????
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
This is a test... of Murphy's Law!
Murphy's Law: anything that can go wrong will go wrong.
This statement is one that I really try to not invoke. I believe in thinking postively as long as possible. But there are days where things are so messed up that it has to be dubbed a "Murphy" day. There's even a website about it http://www.murphys-laws.com/. Check it out.
Well, today was one of those days. I know that there were many other things that could've gone wrong, and I am so thankful that they didn't. But even so, it was a frustrating day!
I was expecting my to-your-door mechanic to come by last night and replace the ignition pack on my car. He was unable to do so, but we set up for him to come by today. I was so excited about being able to drive again, I was almost happy to be going to work! He replaced the ignition pack, which was totally melted by the way, and tried to start the car. It didn't start. He said that it needed a tune-up and that was probably what caused the ignition pack to melt in the first place. Unfortunately, he didn't have time to work on that this morning. It was around 10:30, and he had to be at work at noon. By the time he got everything all put away, it was 11:00. He said he would take me to his house and his sister (who didnt have to work until 2) would take me the rest of the way to work. Fortunately, he called her and she said she also had to be at work at noon. So we are hanging halfway out into the street at this time, with cars honking, and I'm saying never mind, I'll call my daughter. See, she had told me last night that she had to be at work at 2:30 today. So I called her. She didn't answer, but then she called me back....from work. Turns out she had to be there at 10:30. Everybody else was already at work, of course, so I called in and told them I wouldn't be there.
Meanwhile, I called the maintenance man about the plumbing. Seems the toilet has been rocking quite a bit, and lately when it is flushed, you can kinda, well...hear it in the pipes. He came in, flushed the toilet. Nothing. I said...I don't believe this. So, I rocked the toilet, then flushed it. Overflow. Water everywhere. He plunged, it came up in the bathtub. Thank God it was only water! He left, promising to call Roto-rooter. I've not heard a thing since. That's all the information I will give except to say, he'd better show up tomorrow!
The thing is...I don't know...maybe I'm learning to deal with disappointment. Maybe I need to learn to assert myself more in these situations. But since I had to stay home, I wanted to clean the kitchen, wash dishes, do laundry, which are all things that use the drain. I wasn't able to do any of them. Of course, I also had to arrange for a ride to and from work tomorrow, which is no problem (I hope..) and my daughter had to come get me to take me to the gas station so I don't miss out on my 7000 bonus Speedy Reward points. Gotta have those priorities! So, see...it could've been much worse. I mean, the tub could've backed up when I was taking a shower...right?
But it's really kind of interesting. Although I am frustrated and just a little disgusted with people who don't return important phone calls JEFF, I feel surprisingly hopeful. Maybe all these things are getting over with at the first of the year. Maybe the rest of the year will be better. Maybe I have learned how to overcome Murphy's Law. We'll call it Karen's law... Anything that can go wrong MIGHT go wrong, but most times it's only SOME things. I think I like that better.
This statement is one that I really try to not invoke. I believe in thinking postively as long as possible. But there are days where things are so messed up that it has to be dubbed a "Murphy" day. There's even a website about it http://www.murphys-laws.com/. Check it out.
Well, today was one of those days. I know that there were many other things that could've gone wrong, and I am so thankful that they didn't. But even so, it was a frustrating day!
I was expecting my to-your-door mechanic to come by last night and replace the ignition pack on my car. He was unable to do so, but we set up for him to come by today. I was so excited about being able to drive again, I was almost happy to be going to work! He replaced the ignition pack, which was totally melted by the way, and tried to start the car. It didn't start. He said that it needed a tune-up and that was probably what caused the ignition pack to melt in the first place. Unfortunately, he didn't have time to work on that this morning. It was around 10:30, and he had to be at work at noon. By the time he got everything all put away, it was 11:00. He said he would take me to his house and his sister (who didnt have to work until 2) would take me the rest of the way to work. Fortunately, he called her and she said she also had to be at work at noon. So we are hanging halfway out into the street at this time, with cars honking, and I'm saying never mind, I'll call my daughter. See, she had told me last night that she had to be at work at 2:30 today. So I called her. She didn't answer, but then she called me back....from work. Turns out she had to be there at 10:30. Everybody else was already at work, of course, so I called in and told them I wouldn't be there.
Meanwhile, I called the maintenance man about the plumbing. Seems the toilet has been rocking quite a bit, and lately when it is flushed, you can kinda, well...hear it in the pipes. He came in, flushed the toilet. Nothing. I said...I don't believe this. So, I rocked the toilet, then flushed it. Overflow. Water everywhere. He plunged, it came up in the bathtub. Thank God it was only water! He left, promising to call Roto-rooter. I've not heard a thing since. That's all the information I will give except to say, he'd better show up tomorrow!
The thing is...I don't know...maybe I'm learning to deal with disappointment. Maybe I need to learn to assert myself more in these situations. But since I had to stay home, I wanted to clean the kitchen, wash dishes, do laundry, which are all things that use the drain. I wasn't able to do any of them. Of course, I also had to arrange for a ride to and from work tomorrow, which is no problem (I hope..) and my daughter had to come get me to take me to the gas station so I don't miss out on my 7000 bonus Speedy Reward points. Gotta have those priorities! So, see...it could've been much worse. I mean, the tub could've backed up when I was taking a shower...right?
But it's really kind of interesting. Although I am frustrated and just a little disgusted with people who don't return important phone calls JEFF, I feel surprisingly hopeful. Maybe all these things are getting over with at the first of the year. Maybe the rest of the year will be better. Maybe I have learned how to overcome Murphy's Law. We'll call it Karen's law... Anything that can go wrong MIGHT go wrong, but most times it's only SOME things. I think I like that better.
Saturday, January 16, 2010
Light at the end of the tunnel....
Yes, indeed! Light! Light at the end of the tunnel! Hopefully it's not a freight train coming my way (No Leaf Clover-Metallica)
Car problems, car problems! I hate them with a passion. A friend of mine told me they need to make a Karen-proof car, and I think she's right. I'm really hard on cars for some reason. Guess I should've called that college on tv so I could earn money doing what I love, and work with my hands. Wait...that would be crafting...oh well. So today a mechanic made a house call, and it looks like I'm not going to have to pay a fortune for car repairs. In fact, I'm going to be paying close to the same amount I would've squandered on a stupid pyramid scheme. Sis is gonna loan me the money til my tax check comes, so it's only a week or so til I have some freedom again. You would think my house would be spotless by now, but..well...I hate housework! I'm looking forward to the time I can have Rosie the Robot living in my house cleaning up behind me. So yaaaay for the car, and yaaay for my sister, and yaaay for tax refunds, and well...just yaaaay! lol
I don't understand why a city like Indianapolis would have such a lousy mass transit system. I know a few years ago they even removed some bus routes, so people have even less of a chance to get to where they need to go. I drive 14 miles to work every day. It's not that far, really. I know there are people who drive a lot further. But the thing is, there is no way to get there from here unless you drive a car! No bus, no train, no subway, no nothing. It's really sad because people are so big on reducing pollution, but they don't do anything to help! So, I have to have this car, and until I can afford a Beamer, she's gonna have to do. No car payments either, cause I am just barely making it as it is! Eventually I know I'll have to break down and get one, but hopefully I will have started making money selling my crafts online.
I'm rambling, but I'm just thankful for all the people who have helped me during this time. It's just awesome!
Car problems, car problems! I hate them with a passion. A friend of mine told me they need to make a Karen-proof car, and I think she's right. I'm really hard on cars for some reason. Guess I should've called that college on tv so I could earn money doing what I love, and work with my hands. Wait...that would be crafting...oh well. So today a mechanic made a house call, and it looks like I'm not going to have to pay a fortune for car repairs. In fact, I'm going to be paying close to the same amount I would've squandered on a stupid pyramid scheme. Sis is gonna loan me the money til my tax check comes, so it's only a week or so til I have some freedom again. You would think my house would be spotless by now, but..well...I hate housework! I'm looking forward to the time I can have Rosie the Robot living in my house cleaning up behind me. So yaaaay for the car, and yaaay for my sister, and yaaay for tax refunds, and well...just yaaaay! lol
I don't understand why a city like Indianapolis would have such a lousy mass transit system. I know a few years ago they even removed some bus routes, so people have even less of a chance to get to where they need to go. I drive 14 miles to work every day. It's not that far, really. I know there are people who drive a lot further. But the thing is, there is no way to get there from here unless you drive a car! No bus, no train, no subway, no nothing. It's really sad because people are so big on reducing pollution, but they don't do anything to help! So, I have to have this car, and until I can afford a Beamer, she's gonna have to do. No car payments either, cause I am just barely making it as it is! Eventually I know I'll have to break down and get one, but hopefully I will have started making money selling my crafts online.
I'm rambling, but I'm just thankful for all the people who have helped me during this time. It's just awesome!
Saturday, January 9, 2010
Happy New Year?
I have to say as I begin this post, that everything I said in my New Year's post is true. I still believe every last word. That is why it is so hard for me to admit that this New Year so far has not been good at all. In fact, I am suffering from some of the worst depression I've had in a long time. Not exactly sure why, but I am trying to put my finger on it.
I started out the year with car trouble. Car trouble always sucks, but when it's below zero wind chills outside and I have to rely on others to get me to and from work, then it gets stressful. I was so stressed out all week that today I didn't go to work. I wasn't sick...physically, anyway...but I just knew somehow that even though my car would most likely start, I needed to stay home. I woke up and called in to work, sat down on the couch and proceeded to sleep (sitting up!) until 1:15 when my sister called to make sure I was alive. Thank God she called or I might still be sitting there snoozing even now. (12 hours later)
Hopefully, there won't be repercussions from my being out today. If there are, I am willing to accept that. Because I think I figured out something.
I don't know how to live without being in pain! For the past 7 years or so, I have lived with this constant crippling arthritis pain in my knees. It has been my reason, and sometimes my excuse, to not do much of anything. Now, I don't have that pain. I have no reason to not do the things I need or want to do. I have spent the past couple of months sitting in front of this computer playing all manner of mindless games just like I did before. Not to say that there's anything wrong with playing games, but in my mind I'm still a cripple. I still tell myself I can't do things. This is a huge part of my problem, my depression. I need to tell myself I CAN do it! Having my knees replaced has turned my life around, yet I keep looking back. I cannot do that any more.
I have to start right now, today, doing things that are difficult. Doing the things that I used to put off because I hurt. I think over the years I just got lazy (er..)and now it's just a struggle to not be lazy anymore. I can do this. I know I can...I can actually reach my bootstraps now to pull myself up. Today is the day. Things are going to change, and I hope that in a few weeks, I will be able to post here that they have indeed changed. There are other things I have to deal with, of course. I don't like my job, I'm lonely, I don't make enough money. But these are things that will take care of themselves in the passage of time AFTER I learn to live with my new physical UNlimitations!
Keep pulling for me, friends!
I started out the year with car trouble. Car trouble always sucks, but when it's below zero wind chills outside and I have to rely on others to get me to and from work, then it gets stressful. I was so stressed out all week that today I didn't go to work. I wasn't sick...physically, anyway...but I just knew somehow that even though my car would most likely start, I needed to stay home. I woke up and called in to work, sat down on the couch and proceeded to sleep (sitting up!) until 1:15 when my sister called to make sure I was alive. Thank God she called or I might still be sitting there snoozing even now. (12 hours later)
Hopefully, there won't be repercussions from my being out today. If there are, I am willing to accept that. Because I think I figured out something.
I don't know how to live without being in pain! For the past 7 years or so, I have lived with this constant crippling arthritis pain in my knees. It has been my reason, and sometimes my excuse, to not do much of anything. Now, I don't have that pain. I have no reason to not do the things I need or want to do. I have spent the past couple of months sitting in front of this computer playing all manner of mindless games just like I did before. Not to say that there's anything wrong with playing games, but in my mind I'm still a cripple. I still tell myself I can't do things. This is a huge part of my problem, my depression. I need to tell myself I CAN do it! Having my knees replaced has turned my life around, yet I keep looking back. I cannot do that any more.
I have to start right now, today, doing things that are difficult. Doing the things that I used to put off because I hurt. I think over the years I just got lazy (er..)and now it's just a struggle to not be lazy anymore. I can do this. I know I can...I can actually reach my bootstraps now to pull myself up. Today is the day. Things are going to change, and I hope that in a few weeks, I will be able to post here that they have indeed changed. There are other things I have to deal with, of course. I don't like my job, I'm lonely, I don't make enough money. But these are things that will take care of themselves in the passage of time AFTER I learn to live with my new physical UNlimitations!
Keep pulling for me, friends!
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