I watched "You've Got Mail" the other night. I love that movie, and I'm not ashamed to admit it. It always makes me a little nostalgic, though. It is based on the early days of chat, meeting people online, most of whom could spell the word "you" instead of just putting "u". (Obviously a pet peeve of mine..lol) But I will get to that in a moment...
When I began my journey on the internet, most people were in the same position I was. It was new, different. It was 1996 and I was looking for something to fill my lonely nights while my ex was ...well, filling HIS nights. Anyway, I found a chat room through one of the few internet providers in Indiana, and immediately was hooked. Everyone had "handles" instead of names, well, except me...I was Karen and that was that! But we became friends. We talked to each other, had "virtual parties", even met Mr or Ms Right several times. But the main thing was, there was conversation. Current events, sex, advice, and just plain "chillin" were going on in that chatroom 24/7...well, maybe not every night. Most of us were grownups with jobs and families, but we were friends. In fact, I met my best friend in that chatroom. We've been friends for 13 years, we work together, and I can't say that I have another friend in the world that I've been friends with for that long. The reason? We got to know each other by communicating. She met her husband in that chatroom. It was an awesome time. There were no pictures. Most of us didn't have a clue what we were doing. But the prospect (at least to me) of having friends all over the state was just an enormous boost to my morale. We even got together for meetings at a centrally located restaurant, and had parties at our houses. It was great!
Fast forward to 2008...would say 2009, but I haven't bothered this year...
If you want to find a chat room like the one I've described, you have to pay for the privilege of using it. Most of the time they are attached to some sort of matchmaking system, and I'll be quite honest with you....I'm not going to pay $200 a year to be rejected when I can be rejected for free! I've toyed with the idea of re-joining a site that used to be free, just to be able to chat like that again, but unfortunately my finances don't allow that right now.
So, if you don't pay for the privilege of being matched and then being able to actually talk to your matches, you are SOL. So, I have tried public chatrooms, such as Yahoo, and here is what you see when you get into one of those:
Karen: Hello Room!
mrbigdong: hey a/s/l (age, sex, location)
letsdoit: hi karen, wanna f***?
brandy: SEE MY DIRTY PICTURES AT www..... (whatever)
Then you will almost immediately get some kind of instant message asking the same questions and if you DO end up with someone actually wanting to talk, they can't speak in complete sentences, or they will talk to you for an hour and then want to get together to f***. It's really really sad. I even went into a game room once that had chatting, and was waiting for a partner to play Cribbage, someone joined the table and started in on all this stuff, and when I said I was there to play Cribbage, he left the conversation. I was amazed.
Anyway, I know things change, but when I watch that movie, I remember that feeling that somewhere out there, just a few clicks and words away is someone I might be able to connect with. Someone I can talk to and get to know without paying a fortune, without having to fight off the predators. Surely there is... As Meg Ryan says in the movie, just the possibility of being in love....
So, what was once a social network for me has again become a solitary way to pass the time. I long for those "olden days" but I know they are gone for good.
However, I might try again....I could use a good laugh.
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